“What is it?”
“Where have you kept my tie. I just can’t find it anywhere.”
“It’s inside the wardrobe.”
Suman always expected her to attend to him when he was getting ready for office. When they had got married twelve years back she could do that. But now with their two kids going to school her morning schedule was hectic. Getting up early, preparing breakfast, waking up the kids, serving breakfast….it went on and on until Suman left for his office and she took the kids to the bus stand to catch the school bus.
Mornings were even tougher when the maid didn’t turn up. Lakshmi was a nice person and always went out of her way to help Sindhu. She never refused to do anything, quite unlike most of the maids employed by her friends and neighbours. When they had moved into this beautiful bungalow in Salt Lake, in the eastern suburbs of the city, she had felt elated. The apartment blocks would no longer stifle her. No doubt to it, she hated living in apartments.
But then Lakhmi had her own share of problems – her drunkard and abusive husband. He would return home late most of the days just managing to keep himself steady and would beat her up for flimsy reasons. Whenever the thrashing got too hard she had to stay away from work for a day or two. Sindhu pitied Lakshmi. Why did she stay with him? At times she tried to imagine an abusive Suman. If anything like that ever happened she would, surely, walk out. It was not a question of how much it hurt physically; it would be an intolerable insult on self-esteem. Then she would laugh at her idea of an abusive Suman…after all they had been college sweethearts and knew each other so well.
Whenever Sindhu expressed her opinion to Lakshmi, she laughed patiently.
“You don’t understand everything.” Lakshmi would say, leaving Sindhu wondering.
But, Lakshmi had agreed that next time he repeated it she would bring him over for Sindhu to try to talk him out of this beastly habit. Yesterday when Sindhu learnt from another maid that Lakshimi wont turn up for work for a day or two she had expected them. They hadn’t turned up till now.
“Aarati and Vipin, I want you to finish your breakfast within five minutes.” She warned. The kids were in their usual habit of messing up with the breakfast. Aarati with ten summers behind her was capable of taking care of herself but her seven year old brother was still the baby of the family.
She looked up at the wall clock. It was eight-thirty.
“Honey, I’m off. Might be late in the evening. Suman stood beside her in the kitchen just long enough to plant a kiss on her cheek. It’s one of those gestures that have stayed with them for the last twelve years. She followed him out of the kitchen, yanked the kids out of the table and sent them off to the bedroom to get dressed for school. They managed to do that on their own.
As she started to get dressed standing in front of the wardrobe mirror she mused that there was at least one bright side to her tough schedule. It definitely helped her to stay in shape. She was slim, tall – almost five feet seven and medium complexioned. She knew that even at thirty-six she was attractive.
“You are still a head turner, honey.” Suman was always saying that. It was a harmless leg pulling on his part but going by the way people stared at her she knew he wasn’t wrong. Having put on her pale blue saree she turned, her side facing the mirror and arranged her shoulder length hair. That’s perfect, she decided. No unwanted prominence.
“Mama, we are ready.” Their shout brought her back to her senses. It was time she took them to the bus stop for their school bus.
She flopped down on the bed. She felt too tired even to change her clothes. The blast of cool air from the ceiling fan helped her relax. It went just like that on day’s Lakshmi didn’t turn up. Later, she would get up, change and have her breakfast. A brief flip through the newspaper before she returned to the kitchen to get on with her daily chores. Now the only thing she could think of was to relax under the fan. Everything else could wait. She closed her eyes just to enjoy that stupor of sleep come over her.
The ringing doorbell brought her back to her senses. She looked at her watch. It was almost ten o’clock.
“Who can it be?” She murmured rising from the comfort of the bed. Peeping into the door-eye she could see Lakshmi standing outside. She opened the door to let her in. It was then that she noticed the man standing a couple of yards behind her, right on the driveway.
“Do I need to tell you what happened day before yesterday?” Lakshmi said.
No, she nodded. “I have brought him with me. See whether you can talk him out of this beastly habit. I have my doubts.”
Sindhu made way for Lakshmi to get into the house. As Lakshmi went past her she looked at the man standing there.
“Come in and close the door behind you.”
She walked into the drawing room and sat down on the sofa. She was in a fix, should she invite them to sit on another sofa or on the floor. Before she could decide, Lakshmi made herself comfortable on the floor. Her husband followed suit.
“What’s your name?”
It was for the first time Sindhu had a close look at him. Unshaved, it looked he was having a hangover. That’s nothing surprising considering his habits. Otherwise, his hair was neatly combed and the shirt he was wearing was one of those she had given to Lakshmi. He looked fine in it. He must be around forty-five, she decided. He was couple of inches taller than she. Lakshmi had told her that he was a mason.
The next quarter of an hour she talked to them, at length, about the virtues of being a teetotaler. He seemed to understand everything, agreeing with her that he should get rid of this habit.
“Nobody had explained to me the problems of being a drunkard the way you have done.” He went on. “You are definitely younger to me in age but you are more matured. I guess, that’s what education does to you. Don’t worry, from this moment onwards I’ll concentrate on earning a decent living rather than wasting our earnings on drinks.”
As they left, she could make out the gratitude on Lakshmi’s face.
More than an hour had passed by. She was still leafing through the newspaper…not feeling like starting the chores in the kitchen. But first, she had to change. She got up and started towards the bedroom. Just then the doorbell rang.
Must be the postman delivering the registered mail, she thought.
She opened the door to find Bilash with a cloth bag.
“What is it?” She felt irritated, but controlled herself.
“I have put all the bottles that I had back home in this bag. As a tribute to the way you helped me I request you to throw these away yourself.”
She agreed reluctantly, taking the bag from his out-stretched hand.
“Can I have a glass of water?”
“Sure.” She replied putting down the bag on the floor.
When she returned with a glass of water, she found him standing inside. He gulped the water down and returned the glass to her. She took the glass but before she could move it away he caught hold of her hand pulling her to him. It was unexpected and fast…she just couldn’t react. All that she managed to do was to turn around so that he was behind her. At that moment panic struck her and the glass slipped out, shattering itself into pieces as it struck the floor. His hands were on her breasts gripping them so hard that it hurt. She bent forward to free herself form his amorous bear hug.
That didn’t help. To keep her balance she had to shove her behind at him. He responded immediately, his loins ramming against her behind. He was squeezing her breasts rather painfully.
“Stop or I’ll shout.” She found her voice at last.
“I know you won’t do that. All that you need is a good fuck.” He was panting. Recovering from her panic she fought back, her hands catching hold of his hair forcing him forward and her heels kicking at his shin.
He deserved it. Desperately, she clung to his hair. Unexpectedly, his right hand relinquished its hold on her. But it was only a brief respite. She felt his hands on her saree, trying to pull it off. To her horror he succeeded, throwing it away from her reach. It lay in a crumpled heap on the floor.
Suddenly he released her.
She staggered, trying desperately to maintain her balance.
He slapped her hard, the sting ringing in her ears. Tears swelled in her eyes. Then came the second one, sending her reeling onto the floor. She was pinned down to the floor as the blows rained on her. She tried to resist, but most of them got through her defenses. Before long her strength began to wane away and the slaps coming in quick succession became unbearable.
“Please! I beg you…” She wailed.
Instantly it stopped. She started crying, drops of blood trickling down her nose.
“It’s nothing. Will be okay in a minute.” He sneered as he pulled her petticoat to her waist. She felt his hands on her panties, tearing them off.
She couldn’t believe this was happening to her.
“Oh God! Let this be just a nightmare.”
He couldn’t shift his eyes from what he had unveiled…long legs, firm thighs and neatly trimmed pubic hair just covering her mons.
It was overwhelming. She was just what he had fantasized sitting on the floor in front of her, listening to her crap on drinking.
He buried his head between her thighs inhaling the musk of her sex. Tentatively, he started licking her.
Oh God!” She shuddered clutching his head with her hands and trying to move him away. Suman never did that to her. As his tongue became more insistent increasing it’s rhythm and pressure she began to lose control. With a startle she realised that the body was capable of accepting what the mind rejected.
“Aah!” She moaned and moved her hands, putting an end to her feeble attempts to move him away.
Soon her moans became louder as she shuddered under his maneuvers. She was beyond all caring now…her background, education, husband, children…nothing mattered. There is no way out. She will have sex with this man…her maidservant’s habitually drunkard husband.
Abruptly, he got to his feet and started undressing. In his hurry he tore of his shirt and trouser. Lying on the floor, she had a fleeting glance of his manhood as he joined her. He is huge…certainly bigger than Suman, she thought. He raised her legs, arranged them on his shoulders and with a swift lunge drove himself all the way into her.
“Oh God!” She sighed as her vagina stretched to accommodate him. She put her hands to her mouth stifling her moans as the tip of his penis drove all the way to her cervix again and again.
It didn’t last for more than five minutes. An explosion that left them panting for breath.
She looked at him.
“I told you that’s what you needed. You scare me the way you moaned.” He was smiling. Embarrassed, she looked away.
When she tried to get up he pulled her back to him.
“Where are you going, my dear? We are not through as yet. Wouldn’t you like to fuck again?”
“I need to go to the bathroom.” She tried to sound detached.
“But you can’t go like this.”
He stood up and helped her to her feet. One by one, he removed all that she was still wearing… blouse, bra and petticoat. He turned her around.
“You can go now.” He said patting her naked behind.
When she came back into the living room he was sitting in front of the television watching Sun TV.
“Come, sit over here.” He was indicating his lap. She hesitated for a moment, acutely conscious of her nudity but then relented.
No sooner she was on his lap his hands started caressing her again.
Half an hour later the smoldering fires began to burn again. But this time he wanted it differently…to come in her mouth. She had never performed fellatio, not even with Suman. It was perverse… something that you can read only in those English paperbacks. Certainly, she can’t do it.
“I won’t do that.” She stood her ground.
Moments of his ecstasy he will not be able to hold onto her. Wanting to get over the whole thing she started to suck him vigorously.
The pressure of his hand on her head increased…she could feel his approaching orgasm. He was hard and huge inside her mouth. She started choking and gasped for air but there was no respite. She knew it was time to pull away…this would be the last time she would suck him in. He moved swiftly catching her unaware. His hands moved to the back of her head and powerfully pulled her to his groin. It was as if he knew from the very beginning what she had in mind. Tightly pressed against his groin, she was suffocating. She struggled to free herself, but he was too strong for her. Then suddenly he relaxed, allowing her to create just enough space to breathe. It was only a brief respite. The next instant she was again forced against his groin. As his penis hit the back of her throat he exploded. She had no other way but to gulp down his secretions to prevent herself from choking. When he released her she fell back, heaving a sigh of relief. Her cheeks and chin were covered with his semen that had escaped her mouth. Almost immediately she started retching and rushed to the bathroom, somehow managing to reach the wash basin, before throwing up. That gave her immediate relief from the nausea. When she looked up she found Bilash standing beside her. She offered no resistance as he took her in his arms and gently ran his fingers through her hair to comfort her.
“Are you comfortable now?” He whispered. She nodded yes.
Bilash helped her to clean up before leading her back to the living room. He helped her onto one of the sofas and then sat opposite her.
“Take it easy.” Soon they were engrossed in the television.
“Okay its time.” His words startled her bringing her attention back from the television.
“Come here on your knees.” He ordered, opening his legs.
“Bilash! Please don’t force me to do that again. I have never done that before.”
“Okay, Okay.” He seemed to understand and walked over to her.
She didn’t even get the time to flinch as he slapped her hard. Tears and stars sprang to her eyes.
He went back to the sofa.
“How many times do I have to tell you that your preferences don’t count. You don’t know your preferences, anyway. Just follow my orders and soon you will start enjoying it. Now crawl over here and you better keep it down this time.” He threatened…
This time there was no nausea. When it was over she sat down on the floor, her head on his thigh – only inches away from his now satiated manhood. She felt too embarrassed to even look up at him. He knew how to have his way with a woman, there can be no doubt about it.
Sindhu looked at her watch and jumped. It was time for Aarati and Vipin to return home. Hurriedly she extricated herself from his embrace and got to her feet.
“Bilash you have to go now. It’s time my son and daughter returned from school.”
“Let me kiss you there one more time.” He was looking straight at her naked crotch.
She came over and opened her thighs, allowing him to kiss her sex.
He started getting dressed. She found it surprising that she no longer felt embarrassed to stand before him stark naked.
“I will be back tomorrow, same time. You will open the door wearing nothing.”
She nodded trying to get him out of the house as soon as possible.
She bumped into him as he suddenly stopped in front of the door. Turning around he cupped her breasts.
“Tomorrow you will receive a good thrashing first and the you will offer me your last virginity.”
He left closing the door behind him leaving her wondering what her last virginity could be. I will get time for that later, she thought as she ran into the bedroom to get dressed.
Standing before the wardrobe mirror in her pink saree she still kept pondering about her last virginity. And then it struck her.
“I am so naïve.” She mused. But that might hurt, she thought running her hands over her buttocks, briefly cupping them and then letting go.
That night remorse took away her sleep. She never knew this streak of hideous sensuality hid in her mind. Even now she could recount the whole incident in details. At first she thought that it was out of fear but then every time she recollected the incident it made her adrenalins flow. Definitely the recollections were not horrifying.
Was she a willing victim? It was then that Lakshmi’s words had struck her… “You don’t understand everything.” Now she understood what lay behind the physical abuses that Lakshmi silently suffered.
“The way he dealt with me was no different.” Sindhu thought. And like Lakshmi she had endured his physical abuse to satisfy her hideous animal passion.
The stillness of the night was unbearable. She got out of bed and tiptoed to the terrace. The cool southern breeze brought comfort.
How could she betray Suman with a moments passion, she wondered. They loved each other dearly, didn’t they? And is this what he expects in return? His beloved wife fucking and illiterate drunkard. What a shock it will be for him if he ever came to know of it. Didn’t her culture, education and children mean anything to her? She fought to control her tears. There’s no way she would allow Bilash to have his way with her again.
“I am sorry Suman. I beg you to forgive me. I promise never to do that again.” She murmured to herself. She resolved to straighten things out with Bilash tomorrow. She will shut the door on his face…to let him know that whatever they did today meant nothing to her. She felt the burden lift from her heart.
“I love you Suman.” She cried out into the stillness of the night. Thrashing began…
He was hard and huge as he drove himself through her sphincter resistance. She had cried out as the pain shot through her. Scared that people might hear her, she grabbed a pillow and stuffed her face in it. But her muffled howls seemed to excite him even more as he drove himself mercilessly through her sphincter resistance.
“Just relax. Just relax. If you resist it will hurt you more. ” He kept on whispering in her ears.
Gradually the pain began subsiding. He sensed that and immediately his loins started slamming against her buttocks.
Later, she lay in his arms…his hands gently caressing her tear stained face. It had been even more painful than when Aarati was born.
“What will happen if Lakshmi comes to know of this?” She looked at him expecting some sort of assurance.
He broke into laughter. “If you want you can go ahead and tell her. In fact, I was planning to have both of you together in bed someday soon.”
“What do you mean? Are you crazy?” Startled, she sat up.
“I can assure you that nobody other than the three of us will ever come to know of this.” She reasoned.
“I just don’t care. There’s no way I will do something like that. You are making me sick, Bilash.” She shot back.
“Don’t you try to act smart.” He threatened. “In the end you have to agree to my wishes so why create a fuss now.”
“Bilash, you are exceeding your limits. Don’t forget that I can still go the police with a forceful charge that will put you behind bars for at least a couple of years.” Sindhu retorted.
She half expected it but it still made her see stars. He pulled her down to the floor and started slapping her hard.
“Bitch, don’t you dare to defy me.” She could hear him as she tried desperately to dodge his blows.
But most of the blows got through her defenses. He was merciless against defiance and soon she had to give up.
“Stop it. Please stop it.” She sobbed.
“The next time you defy me I will break your teeth.” He warned.
She had to find a way out of this crazy idea. She had to get away from him. But knowing Bilash and his ways that might be difficult…